HopeK429

Today is the day 6 years ago My sweet papa left this earth, he adopted me as his own when I was only 7 and was one of the kindest strongest men I have ever known , My Dad was military and this was the Granpa of my first friend I made when coming to the US and he's still my best friend to this day,, but every summer and holiday we would come to Tennessee and stay with Josh's Grandparents who later became my adopted family and ended up living with me until they both passed, Papa from Alzheimer's and Nana from Heart failure, Along with my Dad Papa taught me so much about life and I miss them both dearly.. but wrote this about Papa a few months before he passed away one day while we were out taking a short walk letting him get some fresh air I remember it clearly...


Today was a beautiful fall day out and so I decided to take Papa out and get some fresh air let him walk around the farma lil bit , He farmed his entire life after leaving the Army it was his passion and you can just see by the look in his eyes when he's out around the animals the tractors and all that that he is still in there somewhere even tho somedays he has no idea who I even am, but today he was with me after our walk and Papa sat down on the patio bench we have by the barn I fed the horse and watched him as I did this.. He didn't move, just sat with his head down staring at his hands.He did this from time to time but this time was different, he was lost in thought. Even with Alzheimer's there were times I could tell he was in there and he knew I was close by, today happened to be one of those days.
When I sat down beside him he didn't acknowledge my presence and the longer I sat I wondered if he was OK. Finally, not really wanting to disturb him but wanting to check on him at the same time, I asked him if he was OK. He raised his head and looked at me and smiled. Lord yes child "Yes, I'm fine, thank you for asking," he said in a clear strong voice and always with a hint of a smile."I didn't mean to bother you, Papa, but you were just sitting here staring at your hands and I wanted to make sure you were OK," I told him."Have you ever looked at your hands," he asked. "I mean really looked at your hands?
I slowly opened my hands and stared down at them. I turned them over, palms up and then palms down. He took them in his as I said No, I guess I had never really looked at my hands as I tried to figure out the point he was making he smiled began to tell me this story. "Stop and think for a moment about the hands you have how they have served you well throughout your years. These hands, though wrinkled, shriveled and weak have been the tools I have used all my life to reach out and grab and embrace life. They braced and caught my fall when as a toddler I fell upon the floor. They put food in my mouth and clothes on my back. As a child my Mother and Daddy taught me to fold them in prayer. They tied my shoes and pulled on my boots. They have been dirty, scraped and raw, swollen and bent. They were uneasy and clumsy when I tried to hold my newborn kids. Decorated with my wedding band they showed the world that I was married and loved someone special. They wrote the letters home and trembled and shook when I buried my Parents and brothers before me and walked my Daughter down the aisle Yet, they were strong and sure when I dug my buddy out of a foxhole and lifted a plow off of my best friend's foot. They have held children, consoled neighbors, and shook in fists of anger when I didn't understand. They have covered my face, combed my hair, and washed and cleansed the rest of my body. They have been sticky and wet, bent and broken, dried and raw. And to this day when not much of anything else of me works real well, these hands hold me up, lay me down,they feed me and again continue to fold in prayer. These hands are the mark of where I've been and the ruggedness of my life. But more importantly it will be these hands that God will reach out and take when he leads me home. And with my hands He will lift me to his side and there I will use these hands to touch the face of Christ." I just sat there holding these hands of the man I loved and called my Granpa, the hands that taught me to play a banjo and a fiddle, the hands that rocked my babies to sleep, the hands that helped me and learned me how to do things with the horses I so love, the hands that held mine when I was scared of the dark when we would walk out to the barn to check the animals every night I was staying with him and nana,The hands that hugged me every time I need a hug, Papas hands were the strength we all needed in life, and I will never look at my hands the same again after that talk with him that day. And I remember sitting beside him and knowing God had just reached out and took my Grandpa's hands and led him home. When my hands are hurt or sore or when I touch the face of someone or something I love ,I think of Papa. I know he has been stroked and caressed and held by the hands of God. I, too, want to touch the face of God and feel His hands upon my face someday just as Papa is doing as I'm re reading this post and wishing he was here with us, What a day that will be :)

There are very few things left in this world that remind me of my childhood .. but this remains:) I remember my Nana making us egg salad sandwiches all summer long and always on hotdog buns.. We didn’t have much … quite frankly , by most accounts we were poor!! But I didn’t know that!! I didn’t know that hotdog buns were for hot dogs only and that garlic bread was frozen in a box;) Today I had a loaf of Fresh , white bread along side that were these cheap dollar general hot dog buns I had bought last week … I chose the buns because that’s how I was raised!!! And as I sat down to eat my nostalgic egg salad sandwich, I thought about my kids … This world and a lot of people around them are offering white bread .. the norm, the traditional way, the things the world finds acceptable … but I pray as they go thru life , and they get the choice to choose .. they choose hot dog buns every time:) Btw .. this post is not about buns nor bread …

In case you haven't heard yet..The Trump administration is about to declare a national State of Emergency soon..and use our military to implement a mass deportation .People are running scared for fear of being deported, crying in the streets they say, but I could care less, cries or no cries..I just don't care because again this is one of the reasons I voted this year,my first time voting in my entire life, never been political but what has went on the last 4 years could no go another 4 years..The US is smack dab in the middle of a humanitarian crisis, so you that voted for Harris wanna talk about women's rights?? Alright let's talk about them.All of them like the rights that All American women have the right to feel safe in their own communities, to not have their future stolen from them by anyone who shouldn't have been here in the first place, do you know Laken Riley fought for her life for over 17 minutes? 17 Long minutes..so tell me again how I didn't vote for women's rights..oh but wait I did just not the supposed rights most think I did. Enforcing and securing our nations sovereignty is pro woman .Every single woman in this country deserves the right to walk down the street without having to worry that someone here illegally is lurking around the corner to murder or rape them, we already have enough criminals to deal with on our own without adding millions of illegals to it. We don't need other countries sending us theirs too. If the left actually cared about women's rights, then they would join forces with us to ensure that no Illegal immigrant with a violent history steps foot onto US soil..but they don't we have laws, we have a supposed system doesn't mean it's perfect and it could always be improved, but we lock our doors at night to protect the people inside, and the same should go for our country . I f people wanna com here to live they should have to do it the right way, and if they can't or won't , Deport them all. ! Wake up people..
If this post offends you then scroll on...

Sometimes when people come back saying that they miss you, they're confessing that they've discovered that no one can love them the way you did. 
They once took you for granted and treated your love like a common thing. Then they tried replacing you, and they were shocked at how impossible it was.
Now they're crawling back, hoping you're still stuck where they left you and you're desperate enough to allow them back.
Whenever people return, always remember how they left.
The way someone treats you when they no longer need you is a true reflection of how much they respect you.
When you feel like you miss that connection, just remember the disrespect. 
You may not have moved on to another person, but you have moved onto something more important. That’s self-respect!!
Just because you're not with someone doesn't mean you're still vacant. 
You're a complete person by yourself, and you have the right to take your time to heal and regroup.
If someone else has been flipping one relationship after another, it just shows how uncomfortable they are by themselves. 
If they need so much support just to face existence, they have a deeper problem. 
Never become the plug-in when someone has failed at replacing you.
They will never value you, and their resentment towards you will multiply because, in a sense, you'll have beaten them. 
They will continue looking while still with you. You’re basically a placeholder. Eventually, they'll leave you for people who don't challenge them to change or grow.
In short, it's also self care when you shut your doors to inconsistent people. You may have a history with them, but when they prove themselves unworthy of where you're going, it's a wrap.
Sometimes your feelings can't think and you have to think for them
People treat you exactly how they feel about you, a reflection of their heart,Don't be blind to the truth, though love and hope may play a stubborn part.
Their actions reveal their priorities, and the value they place on you,A harsh reality check, cutting through denial, and all that's untrue.
If they dismiss, disregard, or disrespect, it's time to open your eyes,Their behavior speaks louder than words, a resounding, painful surprise.
Don't rationalize or make excuses; their treatment is a telling sign,Of how they view your worth, and the space you occupy in their mind.
Pay attention to the patterns, the consistency of their ways,For people show you who they are, every day, in every phase.
Don't settle for less than respect, or tolerate abusive display,Your worth demands better; listen to their actions, and walk away.
Their treatment is a mirror, reflecting their true intentions and heart,Believe it, and protect yourself; your well-being is a brand new start.
The truth may sting, but facing it frees you from toxic, harmful ties,Embracing reality, you rise stronger, and open doors to healthier skies. Until someone treats you right, you will keep on believing that it’s normal for busy people to fail to show you how much they value you. You will keep on buying the excuses. You will keep on compromising. You will keep on putting your mental health aside. You will keep on believing that there are a lot of things that are more important than you.
Until someone shows up and makes you feel weird for how right you’re being treated, until someone does things for you without asking,  until someone makes a way to see or hear you against the circumstances, until someone proves to you that it’s possible to hustle and still have time to check on you, remember you, and reassure you that you matter everyday,
Until someone treats you right, you’ll never learn that people make time for things that matter to them. People find ways for the people they love. And if you’re loved, you’ll learn this even without trying. 
If you’re loved, you won’t even wonder if you’re loved.